I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
