dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
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