I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Randomize