quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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