My hand turned me down
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
