he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
