I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Randomize
