I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
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