no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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