Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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