are you so shy because you have an std?
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
