She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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