Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
