I want to stick my p in your. b.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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