My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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