he told me I talked like a deaf person
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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