Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize