And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
