ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize