I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I would fuck him just for his dog
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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