Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
