you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
