i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
