i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
