thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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