a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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