what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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