i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Randomize
