And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Randomize
