I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
