I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
