McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
