I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
operation have a gay friend backfired
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
