Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
