her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
