You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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