no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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