I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Randomize
