they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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