Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
