Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
