Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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