i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Sober January is a disaster.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
