I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize