my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize