I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
