So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Girls should come with a carfax report
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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