It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
