did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize