I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
